At this very moment my jaw and teeth are aching. The reason for this is because I am so tense that my jaw is permanently clamped shut unless I make a conscious effort to stop it. I keep getting headaches because of both my jaw and my shoulders which are tight and nestled up around my ears most of the time.
And why do I feel this way? Well, I can't go into huge detail on here, but there is a person on the outskirts of my life right now who is making me feel totally stressed out. I am trying very hard to just not care. I am trying very hard not to moan at anyone and to make light of the situation if anyone asks me, but I think that the fact I am doing this is contributing to my tension.
I am a really friendly, chatty person and its like someone... well, this person, has dumped concrete over me. Unless I speak to them they make no attempt to speak to me. I offer to to help with things, they refuse my help. I am kept at arms length at all times and let me tell you - this person's arms are about a mile long.
At first I was upset at being ostracised. Now I am just angry. There is no escape right now. We have to be involved in each others lives for a while because that's the way life goes, but its hard to be treated this way. I have talked to this person in an attempt to improve life in a practical way, but when it comes down to personality clashes - what can you do?
I would imagine that I am not the only one to be affected by this person in this way and I know for a fact that a person I know very well was totally miserable because of the same person.
I know that you may advise me to walk away, have it out with them ... but those options are not possible. I know I am being cryptic here, but take it from me. The options above would just make my life worse right now. I am doing my best to spend as little time as possible with this person and to try to be calm and unaffected. It would appear, however, that my attempts are failing. The best way to describe being in this person's presence is to compare them with a dementor - sucking my joy from my soul ...
Dramatic, I know. In the great scheme of things this problem is not that important. My life away from the dementor is good, happy, wonderful. I just have to get on with it and leave my complaining to the ether of my blog. What a wonderful thing blogs are for venting our pent up and unsayable feelings!! So I shall continue to try and unclamp my jaw, try to relax my shoulders, try to keep my tongue still and not tell this person exactly what I think of them. Bullies come in all shapes and forms and some are perhaps so miserable themselves that they don't realise the affect they are having on others. I will not be beaten and I will not stop being a caring, happy person. So there.
And why do I feel this way? Well, I can't go into huge detail on here, but there is a person on the outskirts of my life right now who is making me feel totally stressed out. I am trying very hard to just not care. I am trying very hard not to moan at anyone and to make light of the situation if anyone asks me, but I think that the fact I am doing this is contributing to my tension.
I am a really friendly, chatty person and its like someone... well, this person, has dumped concrete over me. Unless I speak to them they make no attempt to speak to me. I offer to to help with things, they refuse my help. I am kept at arms length at all times and let me tell you - this person's arms are about a mile long.
At first I was upset at being ostracised. Now I am just angry. There is no escape right now. We have to be involved in each others lives for a while because that's the way life goes, but its hard to be treated this way. I have talked to this person in an attempt to improve life in a practical way, but when it comes down to personality clashes - what can you do?
I would imagine that I am not the only one to be affected by this person in this way and I know for a fact that a person I know very well was totally miserable because of the same person.
I know that you may advise me to walk away, have it out with them ... but those options are not possible. I know I am being cryptic here, but take it from me. The options above would just make my life worse right now. I am doing my best to spend as little time as possible with this person and to try to be calm and unaffected. It would appear, however, that my attempts are failing. The best way to describe being in this person's presence is to compare them with a dementor - sucking my joy from my soul ...
Dramatic, I know. In the great scheme of things this problem is not that important. My life away from the dementor is good, happy, wonderful. I just have to get on with it and leave my complaining to the ether of my blog. What a wonderful thing blogs are for venting our pent up and unsayable feelings!! So I shall continue to try and unclamp my jaw, try to relax my shoulders, try to keep my tongue still and not tell this person exactly what I think of them. Bullies come in all shapes and forms and some are perhaps so miserable themselves that they don't realise the affect they are having on others. I will not be beaten and I will not stop being a caring, happy person. So there.
