Love to Eat... Hate to Cook!!

I love eating. The way to my heart ( other than, of course, diamonds) is through my stomach. I love going out to eat, whether it be at a restaurant or a friend's house. I love the whole ritual of choice and surprise, of unusual and new flavours, of conversation, candles and crystal, of friendship, cosiness and comfort. Sadly, however, this eating experience is not one I enjoy terribly often.

I hate cooking. Not to say that I am a bad cook. In fact I would go as far as to say that I'm a pretty good cook. I make everything from scratch, choosing good ingredients and varied recipes. As a young mother I did the whole thing of freezing trays of organic sweet potato and I regularly made my own bread.


But, if I am to be completely honest? Nowadays I loathe the whole business of cooking. I hate having to cook for my family when I don't want to eat. I hate planning something and then finding that nobody is interested in eating it. The question that burns into my brain and fries my soul is "What's for dinnnneeeeeerrrr?" What is for dinner? Well, obviously something that one of you will hate, if not both of you, my darling boys!

One of my boys likes fish, the other doesn't. One likes curries, the other doesn't. One likes bacon, ham and pork, the other doesn't. This narrows down the range of dishes that they both will eat and it bores me to tears.

I find a recipe that I think everyone will enjoy and they eat it with no word of thanks or enjoyment. After a while it grinds you down.

Both my boys can cook. They often make their own lunches at the weekend. My eldest came first in a school cooking competition, making his own chicken pie from scratch at the age of 12. On Mother's Day I came home to find that my 17 year old had made a Victoria sponge for me, making butter cream and cleaning the kitchen after himself. Brilliant!

I am grateful for when they cook and I am lucky to have a husband who cooks too. But it still doesn't change the fact that I do the majority of the cooking. At the moment I have roast chicken in the oven with home made roast potatoes, cauliflower in a creamy cheesy sauce, more veg peeled and ready to steam. I will make my own gravy from the chicken juices and red wine... but its just bloody dull.

Do I sound very petulant and spoilt? I probably do. But this is my blog and if I want to have a good old moan about something petty, then I will. I suppose I'm lucky that any of them cook at all, ever. I suppose I'm lucky that I can afford nice food, that my mum taught me to bake and make sauces and follow recipes. I'm lucky in all sorts of ways, but right now, if I won the lottery I would never cook again

Toffee Apple Disaster.

So, its Half Term and I have lots of time on my hands - lucky me. I came over all Martha Stewart today and decided it would be marvelous if I wrote a magnificent post on how to make Toffee Apples. How hard can it be?? And I could take the delicious Toffee Apples to my mum's house to share with my triplet nephews.

First Job ... stick sticks in apples

My first job was to stick my sticks into my apples. An easy job, but finding the sticks proved tricky. Bewildered faces met me at every turn when I went into various supermarkets to ask for Toffee Apple sticks. You would have thought I'd asked for some sort of instrument of torture...

But in my Earth Mother mode I was not daunted. I would make my own damn sticks from Mother Nature herself. I grabbed my clippers and went outside in the rain to chop twigs of the appropriate size. Good work Mrs Secret Housewife!!

Then came the other ingredients ...

400g of sugar

150ml apple juice & 100ml maple syrup

And a teaspoon of cider vinegar ...

The next bit I was a tad nervous about. I would go as far as to say that I was scared. I had to slowly melt the sugar in a sturdy pan without burning either it or myself in a horrible sugar scalding accident. I have read that you don't stir the sugar, you just watch it and shake it lovingly occasionally. So I did.

When it had melted I added the maple syrup and apple juice and cider vinegar, letting it bubble and boil for 7 minutes...

bubbly sugary stuff

And that, dear reader, was when it all went horribly wrong.

Drop little bits into a jug of cold water, they said. And the little bits will solidify into lovely crispy toffeeness.... Well not in my house they don't.

Eventually I thought that I would dip the apples anyway. I mean, how long can a girl boil sugary stuff before she keels over from exhaustion? So I dipped the apples and put them to set on my newly bought baking paper. (Non Stick... I hope)

And before my very eyes most of the sugary sticky stuff slid majestically down the apples to form a delicious pool of ... stuff on my tray.

There may still be some sort of hope. There is a chance that in the next 5 years the toffee will set to a crispy crunchy delight, but I am not overly optimistic. Still, at least I tried and I hope that, if you attempt or have attempted Toffee Apples you are more successful than me.

Book Review - The Ladies Book of Baking.

Its the Summer holidays and obviously its raining here. When the weather is gloomy and grey my mind tends to turn to food. Any food. Its a boredom thing I suppose. My kitchen shelf is weighed down with cookery books, bought in the hope of a) alleviating that boredom and b) providing my family and I with tasty dishes. Most are dog eared and well worn. I have my favourites, of course, but I'm always on the look out for something new.

When I went to BritMums Live this year I met a very lovely lady from Parragon books who asked me if I'd be interested in reviewing a couple of cookery books. Well, obviously, at the mention of "cookery books" my ears pricked up and although my blog is not specifically a cookery blog, I thought "Why not?"

So I headed home with a sparkly new book called The Ladies' Book of Baking. Now, before I tell you about it you need to know that my opinion is unsullied by the fact that I was given it for free!!And I am not being paid to write about it ... so read on, safe in the knowledge that you are getting a very honest review. Ta dah!

I have to say that at first glance at the book's pretty, glittery cover I thought "Well this probably isn't that great a book - more style over substance..." But, you know what? I was wrong.

The book is full of useful tips and hints and each recipe is set out neatly and succinctly so that its easy to follow. I like the step by step method rather than long paragraphs.

The recipes are a mix of classics such as Viennese Fingers and Red Velvet cake and imaginative twists on originals like Raspberry Crumble Muffins. All are easy to follow and follow the theme of afternoon tea bakes.

I also like the photocopiable pages of labels and cake flags which are pseudo vintage and I would imagine would look pretty as a picture on a cake.

The book is well laid out and the pages wipe clean - which to me, as a bit of a messy cook is a bonus! Usually my recipe pages are splattered with chocolate and the battle wounds of the kitchen!!

I think the only down side of The Ladies Book of Baking is the print. It may be my age, but I found myself squinting to read the delicate typeface on the pastel pages and had to resort to my specs, but I think this is a failing I could learn to live with!!

All in all this book is a good buy - perhaps as a gift for a young cook. If you are an experienced cook then I would imagine that its contents will already be covered in your cookery book shelves, but I like it and will be attempting, possibly, the Chocolate Mint Cake Pops at any moment!!

The Agony of Having to Cook Tea Each Night ...

I am considering what to make for dinner. I like cooking , but the daily decision of what to cook for tea drives me mad. I do occasionally write menus for the week and this tends to dispel the general misery of decision making .... which is good. I think its the hideousness of opening the fridge door, gazing in and thinking " What shall I make today?" Especially as the chances are that either one or probably both of my sons will groan and hate whatever it is that I plan on cooking ...

If you are a parent you will no doubt be familiar with the rolling eyes and ghastliness of this daily routine. It would be very easy to roll over, play dead and provide some of the processed, brown, oven-baked rubbish that the large supermarket chains provide for children. I am not prepared to do this.

As the recent scandal of horse meat filled processed lasagnes has proved, buying ready made food is not the healthiest of options. And I really am not going to give my children food that I wouldn't want to eat myself. One of the best articles I have ever read was by Jamie Oliver and he said that it was better to eat less meat each week, but of the best quality you could afford, than to eat cheap meat every day. This is exactly what I try to do. The weeks that I can actually be bothered to write out a menu are the weeks that cost me the least ... because I plan ahead.

For the last few years now I have bought my meat from a local butcher. He sells only free range, locally sourced meat and he knows exactly where each animal comes from, from which farm, which farmer. You might think that this is an expensive way to do things, but it actually isn't. And I know that everything I buy is high quality, decent fare. We also eat vegetarian a couple of times a week.

This does not, however, make it any easier to cook for my fussy children. It just makes the food I cook a lot healthier. They have no choice in the matter. They will eat what I cook even if they moan about it. I am beginning to think that they are rather spoilt ... Last night I made Jerk Chicken, which ( though I do say so myself ...) was rather delicious. Jerk Chicken and rice. Tonight I plan on baked potatoes, baked beans and sausages. This is my ultimate easy meal as I feeling rather under the weather.

Sometimes I wonder why my boys are so fussy ... Its not that they will only eat crisps ... although son number 2 would probably love me forever if I allowed this option ... its the fact that their tastes are so disparate. Son number one loves curries, duck, any type of red meat. Son number two loves cheese, ham, fish. Neither, sadly, likes what the other likes. This is, of course a slight over statement as both will eat a bloody steak or any type of chicken, but on a Venn Diagram of their culinary tastes the overlap is somewhat small ... This makes my life a living hell  difficult.

I suppose I am lucky that they do eat a variety of foods, even if the stuff they both like is few and far between. On holiday a couple of years ago a friends children would only contemplate pizza when we went out to eat while my boys were tucking in to delicious pink duck and green salad. This option is not going to be emanating from my cooker on a Monday afternoon very often though ...

The fact is that whether you cook everything from scratch, like me, or buy ready made, its the brain numbing boredom of having to cook every night that is the thing that gets to you in the end. I have weeks when I plan menus and enjoy preparing the evening meal, but, if I am honest with you, most nights I hate even thinking about cooking. Right now I am achy and going hot and cold all the time, but I still am going to have to haul myself up off my sofa and cook. And will my efforts be appreciated? Probably not a lot. If I ever win the lottery or come up with a business plan to earn me a big wadge of cash, I am going to hire a chef. This may be a total cop out, but I cannot tell you how lovely it would be to be the one who looks up from the sofa and yawns "What's for tea tonight?"

Easy Delicious Home Made Bread.

Since I finished my Degree I have started to really cook again. One of my favourites is homemade bread. Its easier than you might think and you don't need any posh bread making machines. In fact - I think this recipe is much nicer than bread made in a machine!

You will need:

500ml warm water
2 and half tablespoons dried yeast.
2 and half tablespoons sugar
1kg strong flour
1 tablespoon salt
another tablespoon salt
cold water (enough to make a wash with the dissolved 2nd tbsp of salt)

This is not a labour intensive recipe. I reckon, from start to finish it takes 2 hours max to make, but of that 2 hours you are only really doing stuff for about 10 minutes. The rest of the time you can:

• do other things
• watch tv
• have a bath
• read a book
• have a coffee

So ... here's what you do:

Put your yeast & sugar together in a large jug & pour on the warm water. Give it a little stir then leave until it looks a bit like this ...

please forgive my photo!!

Put your flour and salt together in a large bowl. If you have a mixer with a dough hook then you're made! Turn the mixer on a low low setting so you don't ruin the motor then let the flour and water mixture get together. Once its together in a dough set a timer for 4 minutes and leave the mixer to do its thing and turn it into a lovely smooth dough.

Or, if you don't have a mixer ... don't worry! Mix the dough in the bowl until it starts to come together, then turn out onto a floured surface and knead. I have always used this method until recently and its fine as well as excellent for cardio vascular fitness!! Knead for about 10 minutes.

Next ... put your dough back into the large bowl and leave it to prove in a warm place. (Just the kitchen side will do). Cover it with a clean tea towel and after about an hour, maybe less,  it will have doubled in size.

This is the moment you turn on your oven ... to 240 degrees centigrade. (I know its hot, but it works!)

Now ... punch it a few times to knock out the air. Tip it out of the bowl and shape into either one pretty huge loaf or two smaller ones. Any shape will do, but I like ovally ones as they're easier to cut.If you have a baking stone then bung them on this, or on a baking tray lined with baking parchment.

Score with a knife then cover again with the tea towel and leave to double in size again ( about half an hour ...)

Meanwhile make a half mug of wash ( water & 1 tbsp of salt or to taste)

When the dough has proved brush the salt water over it and place in the oven for 10 minutes.This makes a yummy crust and doesn't actually taste salty.

After 10 minutes open the oven to let out some of the heat ( and to gaze upon your beautiful loaves ...) and LOWER THE HEAT to 180 degrees centigrade. Set the timer for 30 minutes.

After 30 minutes the bread should be gorgeously golden, even more risen and generally fabulous. Cool on a wire tray and eat as soon as its cool enough. I tend to freeze one and use one.

This is the nicest recipe I've found and I have to give credit to Paul Merrett from Economy Gastronomy whose recipe this is with a couple of tiny tweaks. I really hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

A promise of a Christmas Cake recipe.

Thank you for all your support, fellow bloggers, after my last post. I absolutely love this aspect of blogging - the community of people from all over the world who appear in your moment of need and leave a friendly word, a hug through the ether. I wrote my last post so that I could go to sleep and when I woke in the morning I discovered my in box full of lovely messages and comments. I can't thank you enough!

I thought that a small way to thank you would be to share my Granny's special Christmas Cake recipe ... no don't laugh!! I was looking through my Mum's "Wilsher Recipe Book" this morning and came across the Christmas Cake recipe. My Mum, some years ago, gave each of us, her 4 children, a notebook with all the family's best recipes written down. Its a brilliant food bible full of memories from childhood ... Wilsher Apple Chutney, Raspberry Steam Pudding, Flat Meat Pie ... and among all these recipes is Granny Wilsher's Christmas Cake recipe.

So ... my plan is to cook it, take photos and then share them on here along with the recipe and instructions so you too can sample Granny's famous cake. Well ... I say famous ... its not really, but its an old family favourite!! Now, I am not a food blogger, but I love cooking and I hope you will like this cake.

I was on Twitter earlier this morning and @AnEssexWife tweeted that she had been dancing around her kitchen with her children as they stirred and baked their Christmas Cake together. It reminded me so much of my childhood memories - warm kitchen, carols on the radio and my mum baking mince pies, making Christmas puddings and Christmas cake. The smell of cinnamon and brandied fruit heavy in the air, candles in the front room and a log fire crackling in the hearth used to make our Christmas magical. I know its a month off, but by giving you this recipe now you will have time to bake.

If you come back tomorrow I promise I will have the recipe, ingredients and photos up. If you are coming later I will post a link on here too!!

And again, thank you for your blogger friendship xxx

Economy Gastronomy and the Secret Housewife...

I wonder if you have been watching the tv programme Economy Gastronomy? It is on BBC1 on Wednesdays and I absolutely love it!! I even went and bought the cook book and have been regaling my family with meals from it each day... whether they like them or not.

The idea behind the show is that you should plan your week's menus and start with one main meal, from which you cook " tumbledown meals". For example, this Sunday just gone I cooked a yummy roast chicken and then picked the carcass clean, using the leftover meat for pollo con arroz ( chicken and rice to those of you, like me, not fluent in Espagnol)for the next day. I also cooked up the remaining carcass to make chicken stock.

You end up knowing exactly what you are going to cook each day, removing the whole " standing in front of the fridge thinking oh God, what shall we have for tea tonight" thang.The food is easy to cook and absolutely, bloody delicious!!You also end up saving loads of money as you only buy what you need and avoid the whole impulse buy and chuck half of it away lottery. Yesterday I made Pasta Garganelli which consisted of pasta, broccoli, peas, olive oil and a dressing made from fresh herbs, mustard, garlic, lemon juice and zest.I now possess a window sill bursting with said fresh herbs.Being able to zing up a tasty dressing from my own freshly picked produce makes me feel like a proper chef!


Each Saturday I am making fresh bread, the excess of which I freeze for the rest of the week.I am feeling like an excellent mother and wife!! Although we did have both ends of the culinary scale tonight as son#1 took one look at my Pasta e Fagioli and declared he would make himself packet noodles.Husband and I sat eating fresh pasta with cannellini beans, tomatoes and parmesan, while the boy sat with a bowl full of chemicals...Still, you can't win them all and at least I am trying.Kids, eh.... they just don't appreciate how bloody marvelous I am...