I have noticed in the last little while that there is a lot of hoohaa about breast feeding going on... Now, it is an extremely long time since I had any babies that needed anything other than chilli and garlic bread to eat, but I was interested to read the various views.
Its the kind of subject that people get passionate about.People either want to breast feed... or want to try... or just don't want to.There are people who find breast feeding easy, difficult, relaxing, uncomfortable .... really as many descriptions as there are people... or I suppose I should say ... women.
I breast fed both my boys because I wanted to do that and felt relaxed and happy to do so. For me it was the natural choice. My sister-in-law fed her babies with formula, and again, for her it was the natural choice that suited her.My other sister-in-law is breast feeding her triplets, supplemented by expressed breast milk in bottles and, I would imagine as they get bigger, formula.
The thing that intrigues me with all this is the way that so many women feel they have to evangelise about their preferred method. I am not saying that all women do, but it seems to me that women who feel passionately about whichever method they use, seem compelled to get everyone else to do it their way... Why ??
Surely the bottom line that we all agree on is that we want to have healthy babies who are happy and loved?I know that there are statistics to persuade one on either side of the argument, but my point is... why argue? We all make choices as parents and it is our right to do so. You can disagree with the way other people choose to feed their babies, but I think its wrong to make other parents feel guilty or wrong about their choices. Surely we should all support each other as parents? Its hard enough being a mum or a dad without other parents making you feel like you're useless ? We all do our best. We all want to be great parents.Each method has its pros and cons and as adults its up to the individual to decide which way suits us best...
There... that's my view anyway... off to cook more chilli.
7 comments:
Well Said!
Wise, wise woman! If we could only put our own need for superiority aside...all that competition as to which way is best...
The worst part is that this argument is not just limited to how and what to feed your babies...it progresses as your children grow - when to start solids, do you do organic, and on and on up to and including which school they'll be attending for their University...
If we could just let people have their own opinions and not judge, or attack, or condescend we'd all be so much happier!
I will admit to being a passionate supporter of breast feeding and of a woman's right to BF when & where she likes. I BF all 4 of the FarmHands and was blessed to have had an easy run of it. It was cheaper than formula & healthy for my babies. That's why I did it.
I know someone who did not breast feed because she didn't want to eat healty after her pregnancy. That seemed like a poor excuse to me....but that is just my opinion.
That being said, my sister tried & couldn't. In no way do I think that makes me a better mother than she. It in no way makes how hard she worked to raise my nephew any less special. She works outside the home, I do not. Yet another hot button topic.
I think we get so caught up in trying to defend our own choices that sometimes we tear down others who make different choices. If someone chooses formula, that's their perogative. I'm not going to argue with them about it. The only time I really get up in arms is when people say I shouldn't be allowed to breast feed in public/past a certain age/etc.
IMHO
Thanks for your comments.I have to admit that I too get very 'up in arms' when the subject of breast feeding in public comes up.I fed both my boys wherever and whenever they needed feeding, but never had any criticism for that.I have no problem with people being passionate on either side of the debate - I just object to being told what I should do! I think that tolerance and understanding is what is needed on this and, to be honest, I reckon that's most people's stand point. xx
Thanks for your comments.I have to admit that I too get very 'up in arms' when the subject of breast feeding in public comes up.I fed both my boys wherever and whenever they needed feeding, but never had any criticism for that.I have no problem with people being passionate on either side of the debate - I just object to being told what I should do! I think that tolerance and understanding is what is needed on this and, to be honest, I reckon that's most people's stand point. xx
One thing I have noticed in my old age is that the cry for breast feeding goes in cycles.
My mother fed those babies she could and it was considered the natural thing.
When I had children, it was almost supposed to be hidden again. There was some kind of taboo attached...the only ones who breast fed were poor or hippies.
I fed my children anyway and did not force the fact on anyone by lolling the milk producers out in public. I covered myself or went into a private room.
I admire the women who do breast feed and understand why some women don't.
I agree it should not be a public debate topic but rather a personal choice.
You come up with some of the greatest subjects!
I've been more aware than ever of how judgmental we mommies can be toward each other. And I've even become aware of how I've judged others unfairly. Ironically, it seems that when i judge a person about anything, the same situation comes home to roost at my house and I learn what it's like to deal with the same situation. That usually cures me of judging.
I love this post. If you ever decide to write a book on mothering and your own experience, I'll be the first to place my order. =)
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