Tonight I am luxuriating in my lap top. I have finished my essay on George Eliot's Middlemarch and the works of various nineteenth century critics and can spend an evening kicking back, drinking wine and watching rubbish on tv.
This was the third essay that I have written on my OU course this year and was 2000 words. Those 2000 words had to be wrung out of me like blood from a stone.I remember looking at the title and thinking 'Bloody Hell! I don't even know where to start!!' I am finding the course somewhat joyless at the moment. I love the set novels, but, good grief, the study of the critics is dry stuff.
The thing I find quite supportive is the OU forum.It certainly makes me feel better to read that other people are finding it just as difficult as I am. Strangely there seem to be different rules for different tutorial groups as far as word limits go. Some have to stick exactly to the limit, others can vary the word count by up to 10%. When you're writing a 2000 or 4000 word essay that's a big difference.
The strange thing is that in the end my essay just seemed to appear on the page. I turned to one of my books and it fell open on a page full of exactly the right information for the bit I was writing.Its like being blindfolded and then pushed down a sticky helter skelter. There is no way of knowing where you are, but gravity pulls you inexorably down the slide. I had no idea where I was going, but I got there in the end.I have no idea what sort of mark I will get but thank goodness its done.
I just need to keep plodding on and I will get there in the end.