Sunday, 27 March 2011

Clearing the allotment - sieving and digging, photos too.

I went down to the allotment this afternoon. It had been a busy day - up early for my nephew's confirmation, lunch at his house and to be honest I felt so tired.Niggling at the back of my mind though was the thought that I really needed to get my raspberry canes planted. So I dragged myself down there.

There were a few people down there digging and I realised that there was something different about my allotment.Over the past few weeks I have chatted to various people down there. There is one old chap who is very knowledgeable about gardening and he was the one who bought me 2 packets of green manure seeds. He also advised me on how to sieve out my pile of green rubbish.

I couldn't quite believe it but he had built a sieve and had been working on my plot for about 5 hours or more. The amount of work he has done is incredible. He has separated masses of the topsoil and left it in a neat pile. Bearing in mind that he is 79 the work is amazing.

I felt so moved that he should have helped in this way. Part of me doesn't want any help, but the sensible part of me thinks that any help in getting this done is great.It would have taken me weeks to do what he has done and I don't think I would have done it so well.

When he left I continued digging my raspberry beds and planted all my plants. I was so pleased that when I dug the holes for the plants the soil was root and weed free. I felt quite proud!!

The only thing tonight is that my husband does not seem quite as pleased as me about all this. I was so excited to tell him about the help I had been given, but his reaction was a bit negative. It made me reconsider my reaction and now I feel a bit down. Was I right to be so thrilled? Should I accept help from a stranger? I have been doing this all by myself and I am beginning to feel like an allotment bore. My Man does not share my enthusiasm for gardening and he is totally weighed down by work at the moment. I just wanted him to be pleased, but he wasn't.

Its funny isn't it? One minute, on my allotment I was so happy. I came home full of enthusiasm to share my news and I ended up doubting my self.


Inkling said...

I think what that gentleman did is awesome. I would have been thrilled too. The only thing I can figure is that maybe your hubby had that male competency thing going on that happens sometimes, and he forgot to realize that the guy who helped you was 79 and not like some young guy his age who was trying to make the moves on you. Maybe? Anyway, that's my crazy thought for the day.

I totally know what you mean about how your emotions can flip so quickly from one little thing that gets said. Last night, we were all excited to be having trout for dinner that my toddler and I had caught on Thursday. I asked my hubby to fillet it for me and told him that he could learn how to do that by watching a YouTube video, which he did. But then he messed it up and I heard his cursing in the kitchen. He was so grumpy when I came in to try to help, and so down on himself for not doing it perfectly. Immediately, I was so discouraged and didn't want to lift a finger to make dinner anymore. Hours later, it came out that he was 1. stressed about the fact his boss no longer thinks he's competent at his job, and 2. he was mad that he had never been taught how to properly fillet a fish (he had no dad in his life growing up and his mom was an alcoholic). I was able to deal with my emotions better by then, but was surprised at how quickly I went from excited to discouraged in just seconds.

Anyway, that's my long story when I'm really just trying to say, "I hear you and I understand."

I hope you have a beautiful week and that your allotment and your husband both bring you joy.

Gail said...

The gentlemen obviously shares your love of the earth, too. To see someone that shares that love is encouraging...and he was being kind. So, be grateful, keep the joy and maybe you will be able to return the favor one of these days.

Lauren said...

I think the older generations love to see us take an interest in things they enjoy, even if they are strangers. These days it is so easy to question the kindness of strangers, and we do need to be careful, BUT there is something that has been lost in the hubbub of modern convenience. How awesome that he helped! My husband doesn't share my love of gardening either... we have a big backyard that needs to be landscaped and needs a vegetable plot, but who knows if we will get to it this year.

Caz said...

It is hard sometimes to accept help and over the years I've learned to just try and appreciate it even though that independence in me is kicking and screaming! This gentleman obviously shares your passion for gardening. Don't doubt your initial feelings of happiness. Maybe take your hubby out to the allotment with a bottle of wine, help him unwind and show him what you've achieved.

Louise said...

Your reaction to the help is just fine. I would have felt the same. My OH doesn't share my enthusiasm for the garden either. The little old man would have only helped out with good intention. He must have a good few years of vegetable patch experience! x

Urban Cynic said...

I wouldn't worry about your husband & you don't need him to be fascinated by the things that interest you either - yesterday my boyfriend stated that he had absolutely no interest in the bag book that I had just ordered as I was trying to share my excitement over the gorgeous pictures; I just had to appreciate that we were interested in different things & I didn't have to share everything with him anyway. He said he thought it was better to tell me he wasn't interested rather than hurting my feelings by appearing disinterested or pretending to be enthralled. I kind of appreciated his honesty although I was a little deflated at the time!

He'll probably be more interested in the fruits of your labour rather than the process!