Sunday, 30 October 2011

Post Natal Depression - I was there.

It seems like a dream to me now ... a nightmare time muffled in darkness and despair. It should have been a time of joy and light and love, but it wasn't and I was ashamed.

Update: I am really sorry, but I have deleted the rest of this post. I have never done this before, but I just don't feel I can have my words on a page that my children might stumble across. I am not ashamed of having gone through PND - it was a dark part of my life that I got through with the help of my family, my friends, my doctor.

My greatest fear through all the misery was that I would damage my boys with my anger and sorrow. The thought that I might hurt them now, by writing about feelings that engulfed me so long ago, is too much of a risk.

I have my original post, but I am not going to keep it on here. I hope that you can understand.


Razmataz said...

It's so important to admit to stuff. Especially the crappy stuff. The blog world is so filled with froth and's easy to think the world is really that way.

A brave tale form a brave woman.

sarah at secret housewife said...

Thank you.I wasn't comfortable writing this and I still may delete it.
Sarah x

Mamacook said...

Thank you for sharing that. Even those of us who haven't suffered from PND benefit from hearing from people being honest about their children. It's bloody hard. I remember having times I resented how my son had changed my life. I also remember being struck suddenly by the responsibility and crying in the birth centre on the midwife saying "But I never even had a pet! How will I cope?"

A wise lady said to me once "It takes a village to raise a child". It's true. We don't have that support anymore.

So glad you got past it.

sarah at secret housewife said...

Thanks Mamacook. x

Pauline said...

I can appreciate how hard it must have been for you to write about that time that must have been so dreadful for you. But look at you now! You are the example that could help others who suffer from PND.

Caz said...

Thank you so much for sharing that personal story. Having had post-natal myself and being made to feel ashamed, I know how difficult it can be to admit those feelings. Depression has such a stigma attached to it and many suffer in silence. This post will help bring such awareness! xx